You Can Let Go Now
by Captain Serious
Summary: a Jonathan Toews story.  Chicago Blackhawks
1. Chapter 1

The midnight sky threatened rain as streaks of lightning crashed along the skyline. Jonathan Toews and Patrick Kane walked along Madison Avenue with their heads dropped and voices low. They were dressed in black dress pants and white shirts with the ties around their necks loosened. It was humid, something usual for this time of year, and both men had rolled their sleeves to their elbows.

Jonathan had made it to the door first and Patrick followed behind as they entered the dead diner. The lack of people was precisely the reason the long time friends had chose it. Sam's diner was a hole-in-the-wall kind of place that you usually ended up at only when you're drunk.

They seated themselves and picked up menus from behind the ketchup and mustard. There was no need for either of them to scan it, both were creatures of habit and always ordered the same thing.

"Where's Catherine?" Patrick paused the current conversation and put his menu back. The superstar hockey players usually had their coffees by now.

Jonathan shrugged his shoulders and began to look around. "No clue."

A sly smile played with Patrick's lips as he eyes his best friend. Once again it had been Jon's idea to eat at the dilapidated diner. If it were up to him, he'd be enjoying a free meal at the Palace. Jonathan furrowed his eyebrows. "What?"

"Nothing." Patrick shook his head and bit his bottom lip. Every so often he would look from his menu at his friend. It was his goal to get Jonathan laid by the end of the season. Pat knew it had been nearly a year and a half since Jon had last been with a woman.

Storming out of the kitchen yelling in Polish, both men watched as their waitress argued with the diner owner and poured two cups of black coffee. They didn't understand one word coming from her mouth, but by now, they were used to the arguing.

Catherine set the two white ceramic coffee mugs down on the table and grabbed a sugar shaker from another. She took her pad out of her apron and reached for the pen behind her ear. She pointed the end of her pen at Patrick. "Three eggs scrambled, two pieces of bacon, wheat toast and a slice of cherry pie for dessert."

"I love you." Patrick closed his menu and put it back. Catherine scribbled it down on her pad and looked up at Jonathan. Her smile was sweet and Jon fought the urge to smile back.

"What about you, Jon? The usual?"

"Yeah." He was a man of few words around women.

Catherine's smile was lopsided. She had been looking for a longer conversation with Jonathan but, some days she never knew which Jon she was going to get. He was either in high spirits and talkative or depressed.

Out of the corner of his eye, Jonathan stared at Catherine. She was no older than twenty-two and by the t-shirts she often wore, was a student at Loyola University. Her black hair was long and always tired up on the back of her head and her nails were long and chipped with blue polish.

"I'll put this right in, boys." Catherine slipped her pen back behind her ear and tore the sheet off her pad. After she had disappeared in to the kitchen, Patrick reached across the table to punch his friend in to the shoulder.

"You should ask her out." Patrick wiggled his eyebrows.

Stirring another sugar packet in to his black coffee, Jonathan shook his head. "I can't."

He was very irritate with his friend always rejecting women. Patrick figured either Jonathan was either clueless about women or really had no interest in him. "Dude, she really likes you. And, if I didn't have a fiancee at home I would be all over that."

And, Jonathan was very irritated with his friend always trying to force him out on dates. "I don't care if she really likes me, the answer is no. Right now I've got Madison to worry about. School is starting in a couple of days and this will be the first school year without Yvette,"

Patrick had opened his mouth to say something, but Catherine came out of the kitchen with their food. No words were exchanged between the three of them as she gave each man their appropriate plates. Catherine could tell something had gone on between the two and she felt rather uncomfortable. Something told her it had been about her.

After placing the check on the table, she began cleaning off other tables and counters. The clock above the register read 12:30. Catherine wanted to leave right after Jonathan and Patrick did; she had class at eight a.m.

Once they finished eating, Patrick headed up to the register with the check in hand and pulled out his credit card. He handed it to Catherine, who quickly took care of it. She spotted Jon digging in to his pockets and tossing a couple of crumpled dollar bills on to the table. Catherine knew who they were and she loved they always tipped her pretty heavy.

Both men were now late in to their twenties; Jonathan had turned twenty-eight just a few months back and Patrick wasn't too far behind. It had been six years since their 2010 Stanley Cup win, and unfortunately they hadn't won one since. But, after an unexpected playoff run last season, everyone predicted this would be their year.

"See ya later, Catherine." Patrick offered the young woman a smile as did Jonathan as they walked out.

Together they walked back to the United Center before unlocking the doors to their own cars. The days of sports cars and two-seaters were out for Jonathan Toews. Now it was an SUV with a booster seat in the back with a DVD player mounted on the roof.

Patrick stopped Jonathan before he got in. "I know what your going through is rough, but Jon, you can let go. Yvette would want you and Madison to be happy."

"Goodbye, Patrick." Jonathan jumped in to the drivers seat and closed the door. Sliding the key into the ignition, he wiped a tear sliding down his cheek. Patrick was right; he could let go, but Jonathan didn't want to.


	2. Chapter 2

It was 7:30 a.m. sharp when Jonathan slowly opened the door to his daughter's room. The sunlight had flooded, illuminating the pink painted walls with a soft glow. He found Madison still sleeping soundly wrapped tight in her butterfly patterned duvet. The young father wished he could let his daughter sleep, but he had practice in thirty minutes time.

Light snores were audible as he crouched down and pushed the fine brown hair off her forehead. "Maddy." He whispered. No response. Raising his voice, he tried once more. "Madison, baby. It's time to get up."

Although her eyes remained closed, a groan escaped the six year old as she rolled over and pulled the blanket over her head. The tired girl didn't want to be awakened so early. Jonathan tried one nicer attempt at waking her from the comatose state. But, with no luck, Jonathan stood tall and ventured over to the bay window.

Grabbed the thick material of the curtain in his hand, a devilish smile tugged at Jon's lips as he pulled it open. Now the room was bright with sunlight and the tiny body shot out of bed. "Daddy," her voice was whiny with sleep. "It's Saturday."

Jonathan laughed at his daughters frustration and took a seat on the edge of the small bed. It had been nearly eighteen months since Yvette died and Jon had finally gotten Madison to start sleeping in her own bed again. He just couldn't say no to his grieving daughter when she'd ask to sleep with him for the night.

"I know, baby." Jonathan kissed her forehead. "But, I have practice."

That only caused her to groan more. She hated sitting in the stands coloring while the older boys messed around on the ice. She found it rather boring. Huffing and puffing and looking forward to another Saturday at the United Center, Madison tossed the blankets off her body and marched into the bathroom. Jonathan couldn't help but laugh to himself when he heard the sound of the cherry wood door slam.

While she changed, Jon packed a few snacks, gathered coloring books and crayons and her newest portable electronic game system. He looked for her shoes; Madison always had a problem remembering where she had taken her shoes off the night before.

Tapping his fingers on the granite counter-top, Jon watched as the seconds counted away on the clock. They were late... once again.

"Madison," he yelled. "Lets go!"

Just then, a short brunette girl appeared in front of him with a wide and clean smile. "There's no need to yell, daddy. I'm right here."

Jonathan smiled down at the girl and handed her her tennies. He watched with a close eye as Madison waddled over to the the couch. She put her shoes on with ease, but the trouble came with she had to lace them up. Looking up, Madison gave Jon a pleading look. He rushed over and took a knee. "You've gotta learn how to tie these on your own."

"I know." Her voice was low and apologetic, as if she were scared about saying the next part of her sentence. "You're always too busy to show me to tied them."

That was like a knife right to his chest. Once the shoes were tired, Jonathan picked up Madison, grabbed the bag and headed out the door.

§§§

"Just coffee for you today, Patrick?" Catherine placed a check next to the empty cup and placed her hands on her hips. She was minding the counter, like every Saturday. Serving coffee and pancakes to church-goers and tired joggers.

"Just coffee." He looked at his watch. "I'm already late as it is." Picking up the white piece of paper, Patrick dug in to his pockets. Four singles for the two cups of coffee he had downed and a five for Catherine. He waved goodbye to her as she took another customers order.

The light breeze danced along Patricks skin as he walked the block and a half to the United Center. September was here and in full swing as was training camp. The practice was closed to the public but that didn't stop fans from lining up outside looking for pictures and autographs.

With their success dwindling over the past few years, their fan base had as well. Last year they struggled to sell tickets and it had been nearly three years since they've played in front of a sold out audience. They were back to square one, and the boys were anxious to win another championship.

In the locker room, Patrick took a seat on the bench and removed his shirt. Chatter filled the room and there was no sign of their captain. Once his gear was snuggling fitted over his shoulders and chest, the alternate captain slipped his practice sweater over his head.  
Since Sharpie was traded, ironically back to Philadelphia, Kaner had been dawning the "A" for the past two seasons.

Jonathan came running into the locker room moments later, childless. Patrick figured he had gotten Madison settled in her usual seat in section 101. "Look who finally decided to show up." Kaner joked with his captain. He shot daggers at Kaner and quickly began to change.

Out on the ice, Jonathan found it hard to concentrate on drills. He was worried about the time. Madison needed new Mary-Jane's for school. The poor girl had been forced to wear a pair of shoes that were too tight for her feet.

"You alright, Toews?" Stalberg hit Jon with the blade of his stick on his butt.

"Yeah," he was pulled from his day dream. "I'm alright."

After making sure Madison was okay, Jonathan headed back to the locker room to change. It only took it ten minutes and although he had been the last one there, Jon was the first one out.

§§§

Madison's face was of pure disgust as she looked down at the plate her father had set down for her. She poked the unknown creation with her index finger and looked up at Jon. "What's that?"

Jonathan looked down at his plate as well, not really knowing what he had cooked either. "I have no clue."

Sliding off her chair, Madison grabbed the heavy ceramic plate in both hands and opened the garbage can with her foot. She let it slide in to the bag and following the rules, placed her plate in the sink.

"Should we call Patty?" Jonathan scooped his daughter in his arms and tossed her over his shoulder. Her infectious laughter filled the condo.

"Yeah, but Jamie is gone and Patty can't cook either. What are we going to eat." The six year olds only concern at the moment was finding a good hearty meal to fill her tummy.

There was only one thing that came to mind. "You want pancakes?"


End file.
